Do you sometimes feel so enraged with anger you literally can’t see straight?
You know… that moment when you feel that vibrational change resonating throughout your body that tingles up from your core, out each of your extremities simultaneously. That radiating energy rapidly, yet slowly, radiates up the inside of your head through your spine, turning everything you see to a grayish red color, and sometimes turning off all your common sense, ability to hold your tongue, and sometimes even your memory. You take a step back from your body and watch yourself unleash on the offender.
And life pauses. You have no idea why you yelled the way you did. You don’t know why that “Hulk smash” strength and mentality took over so quickly. Before you know it, it’s done and over with. You couldn’t do anything to stop it… didn’t even feel like you were in your own body for it. It just happened. Anger outburst… again…
What makes you so mad that you can’t control yourself?
Have you ever thought maybe your anger may have more to do with you than with what you’re mad at?
A Lesson About Anger
One day the Buddha was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. “You have no right teaching others,” he shouted. “You are as stupid as everyone else. You are nothing but a fake!”
The Buddha was not upset by these insults. Instead he asked the young man, “Tell me, if you buy a gift for someone, and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong?”
The young man was surprised to be asked such a strange question and answered, “It would belong to me, because I bought the gift.”
The Buddha smiled and said, “That is correct. And it is exactly the same with your anger. If you become angry with me and I do not get insulted, then the anger falls back on you. You are then the only one who becomes unhappy, not me. All you have done is hurt yourself.”
You will not be punished for your anger. You will be punished by your anger.
Overcoming Anger Using Mindset Techniques
Using Forgiveness to Overcome Anger
The first step to overcoming anger is forgiveness.
First, forgive the person that “caused” you to be angry. Second, forgive yourself.
Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you agree with them… it doesn’t mean the reason you’re angry is ok… it definitely doesn’t mean the cause of your anger wasn’t harmful or malicious… it doesn’t undo the hurt that was done.
Forgiveness does, however, free YOU.
Yes: Forgiveness benefits YOU… not anyone else.
It allows you to release that harbored resentment and continued anger that builds up inside. The moment you forgive (whether or not you tell the other person), you release that negative emotional charge within you. You become more peaceful from within, and it opens the door to further emotional healing.
Forgiving others and yourself empowers you to move forward and not allow one event to control the rest of your life. It reduces anxiety, moodiness, and mental blocks that prevent you from striving for success in self-improvement journeys and in professional endeavors. Forgiveness frees up the mental and emotional capacity for you to move forward and heal from the damage done.
Using Gratitude to Overcome Anger
You cannot be thankful and angry at the same time. It just doesn’t work.
Try it… think of something that makes you mad… do you feel that hateful energy start swelling up?
Now think of something you’re thankful for. That hateful feeling suddenly is replaced by fond, loving emotions… and maybe even a little smile.
Natural solutions to help reduce anger
When you start studying how your body interacts with different emotions and nutritional levels, your mind becomes open to a whole new metric for healing.
Anger May Be Caused By An Imbalance In Your Gut Flora
The bacteria balance in your intestines contributes to far more than just ease of digestion. It controls how your body responds to pathogens, making up over 80% of your immune system. And now science is catching up to show how your intestinal microflora impacts your vagus nerve, also known as the gut-brain axis, through your nervous system and influences your mood, ability to focus, memory, and other cognitive functioning.
Nutritional diets eating whole food options, like the Paleo Diet instead of prepackaged foods, is a great way to help promote a healthier microbiome.
Foods that may cause additional anger include tomatoes, eggplant, and greasy foods.
Foods that may help when you’re feeling angry include avocados, blueberries, chia seeds, and cinnamon.
Probiotics have also become a very popular method of assisting your gut health. What is most often overlooked is the quad-biotic: a blend of probiotic, prebiotic (to feed the probiotics), postbiotic (to improve microbiome balance), and phytobiotic (that assists your vagus nerve).
Using Essential Oils To Help Calm Anger
In my more than decade-long season of studying aromatherapy, herbalism, and medicinal nutrition, I’ve found endless streams of information supporting how anger is directly related to your liver.
If you are feeling particularly angry (without provocation) at the same time every night, chances are you’re experiencing anger as a result of a congested or stressed liver.
Simply dilute them (1 drop per 1 tsp of “carrier oil”) and massage over your mid to lower back (over your liver) and on the arches of your feet (where the acupressure point is for your liver).
A carrier oil can be any cold-pressed, seed-based oil (ideally organic and unrefined). This includes most cooking oil, like coconut oil, avocado oil, and olive oils. Personally, we LOVE using fractionated coconut oil, sweet almond oil, jojoba oil, and grapeseed oil. This is the best way to dilute your essential oils for topical use.
Diffusing citrus oils is a fantastic method to enhance your mood to shift from anger to a more peaceful mood.
Facilitate feelings of forgiveness:
Diluting ledum essential oil and applying it over the front and left-center of your ribs helps your body detox those unforgiving feelings.
There are also a few pre-made essential oil blends containing citrus, frankincense, cypress, and mint oils that are great for diffusing or wearing as a nontoxic perfume/cologne while promoting lighter feelings of forgiveness.
Increasing feeling grateful:
Dilute grapefruit and ledum essential oils and apply them over the left side of your chest to help your body purge stored emotions preventing you from feeling thankful.
Geranium, lavender, orange, and juniper essential oils are also fantastic for encouraging a grateful mindset!
Use The “Happy Patch”
If you haven’t heard of LifeWave’s non-transdermal phototherapy patches, you won’t want to miss my review.
One of the patches in their line, is affectionately referred to as “the happy patch,” also known as, Aeon. Simply apply it to your skin or clothes, and wear it for 12 hours.
How does it work? If you haven’t checked out my review, how it works is described in more detail there. But the short version, the patch reflects your body’s naturally produced infrared light back to your body in a therapeutic manner. The end result, you feel clearer, healthier, and less moody.
Anger is very disruptive. It can be caused by stressful day-to-day interactions, poor diet, and underlying health concerns. It also may grow during times of chronic stress, when you’re experiencing poor sleep patterns, or when you’re binging on comfort foods that aren’t complimenting the nutritional value your body needs.
Do your body a favor, dive into some self-care, feed your microflora and your gut-brain axis, ditch the toxins in your home, and do a sanity check on your social life and career to ensure you’re living a healthy and fulfilled as possible.